As men we are called to lead. In order to lead, you need to know where you are going. Before you know where you are going, you should probably know where you are.
It is all too easy to let days, months and even years slip by in which you don’t really know where you are at in your life. Going through the motions of life in a trance-like, half-awake stupor is not good leadership. We must catch ourselves when this happens and bring ourselves back to alertness, presence, focus, intention and direction.
It is important that a man periodically sets aside time for self-assessment and reflection. How are you doing? I mean, how are you really doing in your life right now?
Below is a simple and effective process that we periodically go over inside my men’s groups. We take inventory of our lives, and then check back months later to see where, how, or if we are progressing in the areas that we said mattered most to us.
My encouragement is to set aside some focused time to go over this, so if you aren’t in that headspace right now, come back to this when you are ready.
Find a worksheet to go through the questions HERE.
Women, I’m sure that you could jump in and do this process as well if it speaks to you.
Step One:
Give yourself a rating on a scale from 1-10 in the following aspects of your life. 1 being the lowest or worst rating, 10 being the best or highest rating. Be brutally honest in your self-assessment. Give each point some thought, and feel free to jot down a few sentences explaining why you chose that rating for yourself.
Rate yourself in the following on a scale from 1-10, then write down a few lines to explain your answer.
Find a worksheet to go through the questions HERE.
- Your Physical Health & Well-Being
Are you healthy and fit? Are you taking care of your appearance? Are you exercising? How are your energy levels and are you dependent on any vices or crutches to get yourself through the day?
- Your Mindset and Attitude
Are you stuck dwelling on negativity in any way? Are you living in the past? Are you making yourself a victim, or are you feeling mentally strong, confident, clear and grounded?
- Your Emotional Life
Are you finding yourself dwelling on or contending with negative emotions on a frequent basis? Is there a particular emotion or emotions that are continuing to pop up, causing you distress or to act in a less than admirable way?
- Your Financial Life
Where are you at with your income, debt, savings and investments?
- Your Personal Growth & Development
Are you regularly engaging with content and information that is making you better? Are you growing in your life right now?
- Your Personal Relationships & Connection To Community
When you examine your personal relationships with those who matter most to you, are there any glaring issues that have not been addressed? Is there animosity, turmoil and stress, or peace, connection and fellowship? Do you have community and support around you, or are you disconnected and alone?
- Your Intimate Relationships
How are things going with your spouse/significant other? Are you connected, content, clear and feeling loved and respected? Is there anything that has not been properly addressed that needs to be?
- Your Spiritual Life
Where are you at with God right now? Are you in His Word? Are you actively pursuing spiritual growth, or are you trying to do everything on your own strength alone?
- Your Career
Are you where you want to be in your career? Are you being called to a different field of work?
- Your Contribution & Service
What are you doing that isn’t just for you, that serves others? Sometimes contribution and service comes through your work. Do you have more to give that you are currently withholding?
- Your Home Life
Do you live where you want to live? Is your home environment set up in a way that supports you and makes you feel good? Do you live in order and peace, or chaos and mess?
- Your Purpose/Mission
Are you connected to a higher sense of purpose and mission in your life? Are you engaged with something that moves you, fuels you and makes a positive impact in the lives of others?
- Fun and Enjoyment
Is life all work and all serious, all the time, or do you have hobbies, creative outlets and interests that help you remember the lighter side to life?
- Rest
Do you feel rested or exhausted? Do you sleep enough? Do you take time off to replenish and recharge, or are you stuck in hustle and grind mode?
Step Two
After you have rated yourself in the above category, pick 2-3 of the most important areas that you want to focus on over the coming months. The question is, which 2-3 areas of your life if improved and given more energy, will have the biggest impact across the entirety of your life?
Come up with a few clear actions you need to take to make improvements in the areas you have chosen. What do you need to start doing, and what do you need to start doing in these areas to make progress?
Don’t try to change 10 things at once. Make it manageable and realistic. Improve a few key areas and once you feel like you’ve made noticeable improvements, move on to the next one.
Once you commit to making a change and identify which action steps need to be taken, honour your word and actually show up and do the things required to make it happen.
Revisit your list in a few months and take inventory again.
Have you improved?
Where have things gotten better or worse?
Pick 2-3 new areas to focus on, or refocus on the same ones.
Find a worksheet to go through the questions HERE.